By Never Liked It Anyway
This week, we had a chance to talk with first time author Lily Temperley and hear her bad ass and brave story. Her book, FIX: Sex Lies & Banking is making big waves as it reveals her real-life 50 Shades of Gray affair with a powerful businessman. What started out as a fun affair quickly became a sordid tale of a controlling sadist. Lily’s story is honest, empowering and brave.
Lily arrived in London at the tender age of twenty with a dream: to dominate the world and see as much of it as she could while doing so. Reality soon bit with paying her rent becoming paramount, and so it was that she shunned everything she learnt at law school and opted for a shiny, lucrative job in the city.
Roll the clock forward more than a decade, she was married, she was single; she was armed with a list of more than 50 countries visited and she had money. She was hit by an epiphany – she wanted to write.
The basis for her first book (and subsequent two books in their planning stages) is her own life experience. She practically grew up in an investment bank, had jobs working in the executive suites of two of Britain’s largest firms, and has seen both these companies handle catastrophes on a global stage. She also had an intimate relationship with a very senior executive, providing a real life romantic angle to the corporate setting in her new novel.
Here’s what Lily had to say about all things love, loss and moving on!
What do you do and why do you do it?
I currently work for a Financial Services firm. I do it because it supports my lifestyle. I travel a lot for business and pleasure and I can afford to indulge my shoe and handbag addiction!
What’s the best gift you ever got?
The best gift I ever got?… that is a hard one as I have been spoiled many times with fabulous things. I think my favorite gift is an antique sliver matchbox holder with my initials on it. I put it on a belcher chain and wear it as a necklace. It is probably not worth much but it’s from the 1900s and holds massive sentimental value because of who gave it to me and how thoughtful the gift was. I just got a pair of 20th anniversary Louboutins for my birthday which, are pretty awesome.
What’s the worst gift you ever got?
An ex bought me a pair of python skin boots. I love the boots and had coveted them in the store before we broke up. I think it is the worst gift as I didn’t want them from him, but felt I had to accept them, and now I don’t wear them as they remind me of him! Maybe I should list them on NeverLikedItAnyway.com!
What’s your advice for all things love, sex and dating?
I think it is so important to follow your heart. I spent a lot of time worrying about whether men liked me and would they ask me out on a second date… when I stopped to think about it, I didn’t fancy them that much so it was more an exercise in seeking external validation. You need to love yourself before you can really be loved by anyone else. As soon as I remember that and am kind to myself I attract the type of man I want to be with. With dating, it can be very hit and miss. I think, as with all things in life, it is important not to take anything too seriously. Have fun!
Finally, with sex, there is so much judgment around this… many woman struggle to draw a line between sex and love and this leads to attachment that can be detrimental to one’s self esteem and, ultimately, unsatisfying. Again, have fun, go easy on judging yourself and listen to your intuition. Usually early red flags will turn into screaming alarm bells so don’t ignore them!
What’s your go to pick me up?
Shopping! Retail therapy always makes me feel better. Even window shopping can improve my mood…
Tell us about your first heartbreak…
I am a hopeless romantic so it was the first guy I ever kissed. It didn’t go anywhere but I was young and had a mega-crush on the guy. I see him now many years later in my Facebook feed with his receding hairline and wonder why I ever thought he was hot!
Tell us about a time you Bounced Back better than ever
The time in my life now… I am feeling very content with who I am and smile thinking about the experiences that I have had. It is nice to know that any feelings of regret have evolved to understanding the lessons learned. Maybe I am finally becoming an adult. Scary to think…
(From Never Liked It Anyway, the number one destination for all things break-ups and bounce-back! It’s the place to buy, sell and tell all things ex! Sell your breakup baggage, tell your story and join the community of rock stars bouncing back better than ever! )