From Never Liked It Anyway

Know how to ruin the perfect lazy Sunday? This sounds pretty damn close to me: you’re spending some good quality time on the couch with your beau, watching the latest Kristen Wiig masterpiece and enjoying that Seamless dinner when his phone rings. No, it’s not his mum or mate or boss, but surprise surprise, his ex-girlfriend! He gives you that “sorry babe, important” look and leaves the room to answer her call. Welcome to that awkward situation every girl wants to be cool about but very few can – your guy and his ex are actually friends! This week, one of our crew just couldn’t stay silent about it anymore and needed to react. So once again we called on the powers of Cinderella and Beyonce and asked what would they do?

Cinderella would be her absolutely loving and charming self and invite his ex to join you on the couch. And yes, of course, to share your favorite tofu salad (anyone else think Cinderella would be a vegan?!) and sav blanc. And then you’d have all the time in the world to make the evening all about her and her love life…and how no one else can live up to how well YOUR boyfriend used to treat her. The way Cinderella would see it, if the ex is important to her man she’s important to her, too. He will appreciate your kindness, she will become your bestie too and you’ll all live happily ever after.

Beyoncé however would flip sh*t the minute that phone rings. How dare he interrupt your quality time to answer her call. Why does she still have his number in the first place? You’re his queen now and there clearly is only room for one queen in his life. So being besties with his ex-girlfriend an absolute no-go!

But is it really that black and white? Why does this situation freak us out in the first place? Is she really the problem or is there a problem in your relationship? When you’re having that mental meltdown – these are the real things to consider:

1. What are you afraid of?

Forget the extra 5 pounds you have on her! Why are you so freaked out by the thought of him spending time with her? Are you afraid he might cheat on you? Are you afraid she might give him something you can’t? If you’re afraid he might still have feelings for her that’s definitely something that needs to be talked about whether or not they’re friends that hang out. The silent treatment will just make you more paranoid and push him away.

2. Are you overreacting?

Take a step back for a second. You gotta admit, no matter what happens towards the end of a relationship the person we once loved will always remain a part of our life in one way or the other. You might reminisce about your past loves during bad days or curse about the ones who hurt you during drunk moments, but you will most definitely never forget them. So doesn’t your beau deserve to decide how to deal with his past loves? At the end of the day they’ve shared a significant part of their lives and she’s supported him in times well before you were on the scene. So giving some room to respect their past, without impeding on your future, is reasonable.

3. Do you need to speak now or can you forever hold your peace?

Most importantly, be honest with yourself. Will you freak out every time you see her name on the display? Will this issue always create huge awkwardness between the two of you and leave you feeling deeply uncomfortable? Or can you accept how he chooses to stay in touch with his ex? Can you trust him completely and not check your phone every two seconds when he’s out for coffee with her? You need to decide for yourself once and for all – do you need to address the issue or can you let it go? Don’t become a ticking time bomb!

Just remember, everybody has an ex. And we’re all somebody’s ex too. If you DO decide to voice your concern he might be repelled by your jealousy! He could however also be completely understanding and save both of you a lot of unnecessary fights. The important thing here is to be honest with yourself.

(From Never Liked It Anyway, the number one destination for all things break-ups and bounce-back! It’s the place to buy, sell and tell all things ex! Sell your breakup baggage, tell your story and join the community of rock stars bouncing back better than ever! )

Related: Jay-Z and Beyonce

(Back in the 1980’s, True Love Magazine had a monthly essay contest for its readers. The theme was, The Life I Live. Here is the winner of the February 1980 issue. )

The past few weeks have been the happiest ones of my life. They have been filled with the joy of my engagement to Jim, a man I love and, yet, have never seen.

I am blind. There was a time not too long ago, when I wouldn’t have believed that I could feel so fulfilled without the benefit of my sight, but meeting Jim has changed all that.

Three years ago, I was driving home from a friend’s house, when the steering went out in my car and I crashed into a parked pickup truck. Although I suffered only a cracked wrist and some bruised ribs, a piece of glass from the shattered wind­shield was lodged in my left eye and caused me to go blind. Thankfully, my right eye was undamaged—until I contracted sympathetic optholmia. That’s a disease which occurs, when one eye is struck blind by an injury and the other, healthy eye also loses its vision, even though there is nothing medically wrong with it. I was heartbroken. The thought of having to go through life never seeing sunsets was unbearable.

For the first couple of months after the accident, I became a recluse, wallowing in self-pity, and refusing to see anyone except my parents. I probably would have shut them out, too, but I needed somebody to help me get around. But gradually, I came to realize that life is what you make of it, and that all the self-pity in the world wouldn’t bring back my precious sight. So, with my new attitude, I began attending classes at an Institute for the Blind. I learned to read and write in Braille, and generally, how to get along. I lived at home, and my parents gave me all the love and support that anyone could ask for.

I applied myself to my studies, and began to enjoy my time at the In­stitute, as much as I had my time at college. I even took some special education classes, and at the end of two years, I became an assistant teacher in a class for blind children. Although I had never been religious before, I began going to church regularly. Soon, I became involved with many projects such as bazaars, picnics, and charity dinners. The people I met were so kind and warm toward me that, for the first time since the accident, I felt perhaps there was a reason for my blindness. I felt a oneness with God that I had never before experienced, and I learned to accept Him into my life.

I have to say that God was responsible for all of my blessings because it was through church that I met Jim. Jim was also involved in the church that I at­tended, and he was introduced to me by a mutual friend during one of the picnics that our people had organized. We began to talk, and I found myself telling Jim things that I had never told anyone else. He was sweet and understanding, and fit every cliche about how a first true love should be. We spent a lot of time together, taking walks, holding hands, and laughing. It wasn’t too long, before I realized that I was deeply in love with him.

One evening, as we were walking along the beach, just before the sun went down, Jim took my hand and said, “I can’t think of anything to give you that’s more beautiful than a sunset. I know you can’t see it with your eyes, but maybe, you can see it with your heart.” Then, he asked me to marry him.

It won’t be long before Jim and I will be living in our own house, and I count the minutes until then. He’s everything I ever wanted in a husband, and while he can’t give me back my sight, he can still make me see. He gave me a sunset. What more could I ask for?

From Never Liked It Anyway

Yeah, you’re on an online dating site… Now what? In the spirit of sisterhood, here are some tips to ensure he’ll swipe right!

Let’s be honest, looks spark his interest.

• Overexposure is never cool. Unless you’re looking for a “hit and split” situation, (if you are though, rock on, Sister!) think twice about posting pics to your profile that expose more of your body than your personality.
• Though posting a couple of group photos is cool, it’s pretty dicey if you don’t post recent pics that clearly show your face.
• Keep the duck lips, fish lips, and finger mustache pics in 2014. BTW, bathroom selfies are a turnoff.

Baring your inner hotness will keep the fires burning.

• Keep it simple, Beauty! Be clear about who you are and know what makes you fabulous. Share that, but only that. #ownyourawesome
• It’s a small world… Coworkers, potential bosses, friends, Mr. Right Now, and your future Mr. Right could see your profile. Keep it classy!
• Save it for the shrink. This is definitely NOT the place to discuss past relationship fails.
• Put your best face forward but keep it real. We know you’re not a catfish so don’t turn yourself into one by stretching the truth, lying about your age, or over-photoshopping your pics. That’s just nothing but bad karma and who needs that?
• Have a girlfriend read it before you make your profile public.

So there you have it. Some tips to kickstart your Dating Resolutions with a little class.

(From Never Liked It Anyway, the number one destination for all things break-ups and bounce-back! It’s the place to buy, sell and tell all things ex! Sell your breakup baggage, tell your story and join the community of rock stars bouncing back better than ever! )

By Katherine Sharma

I must admit that I had not read The Alchemist, an allegorical novel by Brazilian-born Paulo Coelho, until this year. First published in the U.S. in 1993, the novel is celebrating over 20 years of international popularity. It has been translated into at least 56 languages and is in its 345th week on The New York Times paperback best seller list as of today. So why the cult status?

It is the story of a young Andalusian shepherd boy who travels to the Egyptian pyramids after a recurring dream of finding treasure there, with encouragement from a Gypsy fortune-teller and a strange old man claiming to be a king. Along the way, he is robbed and earns money in business with a crystal merchant, joins a caravan across the desert and meets a bookish Englishman on his own quest, falls in love with a beautiful Arab girl in an oasis, survives desert tribal warfare, and is guided by omens and a mystical Alchemist to the treasure of his dream, or “Personal Legend.”

That plot synopsis and the book’s short length and stylistic simplicity are deceptive; this novel is densely packed with complex spiritual and psychological questions. Basically, it is an allegory of the obstacles we face to finding and fulfilling our dreams, or Personal Legends per the novel. What obstacles? First come the prejudice, anxiety and guilt that, beginning in childhood, society employs to cause us to abandon dreams as impossibilities and ignore our hearts. Next is the love we have for others, because we fear to lose or hurt loved ones if we focus on realizing a personal calling. Third, we fear suffering from the inevitable defeats and failures. Last comes our fear of actually realizing a dream, of disappointment and guilt in success. But if all fears are overcome and you do things that truly fill you with enthusiasm for your life, then you gain the joy and peace that come from being in tune with the “Soul of the World” and the chosen path for you.

After finally reading the book, I realized that, contrary to my assumption, The Alchemist has not achieved cult status because it offers a specific way to happiness. Rather, it reminds us, mired in day-to-day tedium and anxiety, that if we are willing to disinter deferred dreams, trust in the nurturing power of love, and accept the inevitable scars, we can live more fully. That’s a best-selling lesson. To buy the novel, go to http://www.amazon.com/The-Alchemist-Paulo-Coelho/dp/0061122416

ABOUT  KATHERINE SHARMA

Katherine Sharma’s family roots are in Louisiana, Oklahoma and Texas. But after her early childhood in Texas, she has moved around the country and lived in seven other states, from Virginia to Hawaii. She currently resides in California with her husband and three children. She has also traveled extensively in Europe, Africa and Asia, and makes regular visits to family in India. After receiving her bachelor’s degree. in economics and her master’s degree in journalism from the University of Michigan, Katherine worked as a newspaper and magazine writer and editor for more than 15 years. She then shifted into management and marketing roles for firms in industries ranging from outdoor recreation to insurance to direct marketing. Although Katherine still works as a marketing consultant, she is now focused on creative writing.

By Brianna Porter

It’s not unusual to sit through a few breakups on a television show before your favorite character finds their soul mate, but even with this expectation, this can make the series emotionally exhausting. Plus, it might start imitating your life, and that is an unnecessary walk down memory lane involving possible tears and junk food. I mean, is anyone else sick of most relationships being portrayed as destructive and challenging? Love is a battlefield, not a war. That’s why we’d like to take the time to spotlight some of the better examples of love — from relationships to self love — that should be accepted and celebrated as the new norm. Enough with glamorizing abusive relationships (lookin’ at you “Fifty Shades of Grey”)…give me realistic love, or give me death!

Glenn & Maggie- “The Walking Dead”

Maybe not the best definition of “realistic”, given the circumstances, but their situation really only highlights how strong their love is. Plus, their arguments, if any, will really only be about how they should plan on surviving…no resurfacing ex-girlfriend (though maybe in zombie form). If their love can survive a zombie apocalypse, it can survive anything!

Leslie Knope & Ben Wyatt- “Parks and Recreation”

Progressive, productive, and all-around adorable, Leslie and Ben really only fought when it was about whether their relationship was professional or not (very much unlike the usual jealousy-fueled arguments most television couples face). They are refreshing, inspiring, and thank goodness- drama free.

Ed Sheeran

Ed has always been a hopeless romantic, as seen through his music, but his new hit song “Thinking Out Loud” has got me thinking (though not as loud) about how gentlemanly he seems to be. While his relationship status is usually unknown, I’m sure whoever he is with (or has been with) is/was treated right. You probably will not find one Robin Thicke-esque song on any of his albums, which is great news for feminists.

Nicki Minaj

Her music has always been super fun and empowering, but her newest album “The Pinkprint” was all about being honest and appreciating who she really is. Plus, she doesn’t seem like the type of person to take anybody’s crap in a relationship…who knew the queen of rap was also the queen of self love?

Thomas Sanders

If you haven’t seen this vine star yet, do yourself a favor and check him out. His most popular bit is narrating strangers lives and filming their reactions (one involved one girl tackling her boyfriend to the ground unexpectedly, which was utterly adorable). In addition to being hilarious, he is also super sweet and teaches accepting and loving yourself and others. He claims he doesn’t hate a single soul, and that’s not hard to believe!

Jerome Jarre

It’s no secret that this french vine star loves life and himself, and he is undeniably funny. I’ve yet to see him feeling glum about life…and positivity is a key ingredient to a healthy relationship! If more men were like him, the world would be such a beautiful place…and also mostly French. But ooh la la…we wouldn’t complain.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

This couple has to be on this list…it is undeniable how much they love each other! They always stand by each other, have tons of beautiful children (whom they encourage to embrace their native culture and do not force them to conform), and have great chemistry on screen. Plus, their philanthropists. They’re just all around good people in a healthy relationship…let’s have more like them!

From Never Liked It Anyway, the number one destination for all things break-ups and bounce-back! It’s the place to buy, sell and tell all things ex! Sell your breakup baggage, tell your story and join the community of rock stars bouncing back better than ever! 

(Stories from our past: This week we explored our fascinating library of vintage articles and found one from 1977 about how our legs can reveal a lot about what’s going on in our brains. Read on and get a leg up on the signals others might be sending you!)

You’ve probably heard of body language–it’s all about what your body is saying in the way you walk, the way you stand, the way you sit, and in your overall body carriage. Bud did you know that even your legs have a language of their own? To someone who’s an expert at interpreting “leg language,” you might just be giving away your most secret thoughts with the simple crossing of your ankles.

And the way you move your legs can reveal something about you, too! If legs move slowly and seem tired, chances are you are saying that all of you is just plain exhausted. If legs move with agility and confidence, chances are you’re feeling “up” all over.

The brief guide below will help you to know some of the things your legs are “saying”–before they tell more than you might want them to.

1. If your ankles are “locked”–legs crossed tightly at the ankles and usually off to one side–you’re saying that you’d like to be saying more. You’re holding something back. If you would like a little prodding, this is the gesture to take, since your onlooker may just edge forward to help you out a bit.

2. If, on the other hand, ankles are easily crossed and your legs are frimly in front of you, it indicates that you have an organized mind. You are a person very much in control of your emotions. This is the pose Grandma considered very ladylike.

3. You’re agreeable–if not all that interested–when sitting with legs comfortably uncrossed, knees spread about a foot apart and feet firmly and parallel in front of you. Such a pose says you are not resisting the person you’re with and you probably don’t feel threatened. If you’re leaning forward in this position, you’re becoming more interested–if leaning away, less interested.

4. Legs that are crossed at the knee get their meaning from the direction in which the elevated foot is pointing. If the foot is pointing toward the person you’re with, you are showing interest. Of course, if the elevated foot is pointing away from the person, you are not interested. Further, if you’re moving or making circles with this foot, you’re nervous!

5. If you’re slowly crossing and uncrossing your legs, touching the inside of your calves, knees, or thighs, or have slipped a shoe and are balancing it on your toes–anything goes! Your’e indicating that the person you’re with is making you feel very comfortable and that you’re very interested!

6. If you’re sitting with one leg up and underneath you, you’re a pretty easygoing person. And you’ll most likely be agreeable–ready to cooperate.

Looks like leg watching now means more than just looking at legs that are lovely. It also means “reading” what they’re communicating. And now you know how to make your legs “say” exactly what you mean!

In honor of the hit film, 50 Shades of Grey, TruLOVEstories decided to really dig deep and find out what goes on inside a man’s head. We’ve compiled a list of 50 questions girls should ask guys while getting to know them. Some are sexy, some are flirty, some are just plain silly. No matter how you look at it though, they all will be great conversation starters and who knows, one or two of them could lead to your own erotic story.

1. Are you into brunettes, red-heads, or blondes?

2. What do you think is the sexiest part of a woman to kiss?

3. Which is better? Tight jeans or short skirts?

4. Describe your dream girl?

5. Money isn’t an object, describe your perfect first date.

6. Name your favorite romantic movie.

7. Would you rather be tied up or tie someone up?

8. At what age did you lose your virginity?

9. What is your biggest turn-on when it comes to dating?

10. What is your biggest turn-off about dating?

11. What’s the most romantic song to listen to while making love?

12. Are you into feet? If so, what do you like about them?

13. Should food ever be brought into a night of love making?

14. Do you genuinely believe in love at first sight?

15. Have you ever spanked or been spanked during sex?

16. Name the craziest place you’ve ever had sex.

17. What do you think is a woman’s best feature?

18. Are you a member of the mile high club?

19. How many dates do you require before having sex?

20. Do you enjoy phone sex?

21. What about sexting?

22. Have you ever made a homemade sex tape?

23. What’s your favorite place on your body to be kissed?

24. Have you ever bought lingerie for a girl?

25. Has anyone ever walked in on you while you were having sex?

26. Have you ever sent erotic pictures of yourself to someone before?

27. After getting a girl’s number, how long do you wait to call her?

28. Are you into bedroom role playing?

29. Where is the one dream place you want to have sex?

30. Talk about your first sexual experience.

31. Have you ever had a threesome? Would you want to?

32. What guilty fetish would you like to admit to?

33. Ever had a one night stand?

34. Do you prefer sex with the lights on or off?

35. Are you a good dancer?

36. How big are your hands?

37. What celebrity do you fantasize about?

38. Have you ever been skinny dipping?

39. What’s the most orgasmic thing a woman can do to you?

40. Describe yourself in three simple words.

41. Have you ever used any sex toys?

42. Do you like to be in control, or do you like to let a woman be in charge?

43. Do you really read Playboy for the articles?

44. Have you ever been so drunk you don’t remember having sex?

45. How often do you work out?

46. Ever tried online dating? Did it work?

47. If it was up to you, how many times a week would you want to have sex?

48. Hotter fantasy: The naughty nurse, cheerleader or cosplay character?

49. Have you seen the movie or read Fifty Shades of Grey?

50. What dirty thoughts are going through your mind right now?

Related Article: 50 Shades of Chicken